Archive for the ‘hipcoaches.com’ Category
If the hurtful event you attempt to release involved someone whose relationship you otherwise value then forgiveness can lead to reconciliation. However, this isn’t always the case. Reconciliation might be impossible if the offender has died or is unwilling to communicate with you. In some cases reconciliation might not be appropriate. Still forgiveness is possible — even if reconciliation isn’t.
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Why is it so easy to hold a grudge?
When you’re hurt by someone you love and trust, you might become angry, sad or confused. If you dwell on hurtful events or situations grudges filled with resentment, vengeance and hostility can take root. If you allow negative feelings to crowd out positive feelings you might find yourself swallowed up by your own bitterness or sense of injustice.
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I wanted to follow up with some wonderful benefits that you can experience in your everyday life should you choose to release the emotional pain of sitting in unforgiveness. The process of forgiving is un-going, imagine if you were holding unto some emotions from your childhood it would certainly take a process to truly let that stuff go. It is not a quick fix process so be patient, gently and loving with yourself! Letting go of the grudges and bitterness can make way for compassion, kindness and peace.
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When someone you care about hurts you, you can hold on to anger, resentment and thoughts of revenge — or embrace forgiveness and move forward. Nearly everyone has been hurt by the actions or words of another. Perhaps your mother criticized your parenting skills, your colleague sabotaged a project or your partner had an affair. These wounds can leave you with lasting feelings of anger, bitterness or even vengeance — but if you don’t practice forgiveness, you might be the one who pays most dearly. It’s like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die.
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Here are some ideas to get you started on spring cleaning your Life:
1. Get a goal that is big enough to motivate you. For me I wanted more time to spend with those I care about rather than looking for that paper one more time.
2. Get the whole family involved with motivating incentives.
3. Figure out what makes you feel good as you part with your precious things. For me I couldn’t stand knowing that what I was giving up was going in the garbage dump to be seen no more. Giving them to charity created a much better feeling tone as I knew I was blessing someone else.
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I have a confession to make; you know they say confession is good for the soul. Well, here goes: I’m a born pack-rat, coming from a long line of pack-rats. If you don’t know what a pack-rat is, it’s a furry mammal that lives in the dessert and makes its nest with twigs and all manner of rubbish so that it appears these creatures are living in a small dump. It’s easy for me to buy stuff (esp. books) and very hard to part with things. I have a friend who is a minimalist, so you can see a potential source of conflict right there. I am not always grateful to her efforts to keep my collections in check either!
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This morning I was reading about a 10 year old kid in England that put out a 10 track CD. He is making waves online and social media. The key point for me was that the kid doesn’t speak because he is autistic but he can sing. Hmm. What is stopping me again from being a beneficial presence in the world? I love reading these stories as they remind me to keep going. I often think about the minds of people with autism. What are they hearing, seeing or feeling? How is the world through their filters?
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How many times have you found yourself rolling over in bed and wondering what day is it? Sometimes I find myself tracing back my steps as I look up at the ceiling, trying to figure out what I did the night before. Somewhere along the line I have a light-bulb moment, while rushing for the cellphone to look at the time. Oh it’s so and so day and I must be there in 30 minutes.
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Are we aware yet that society changes when we change what we’re embarrassed about. I could find so many changes right now that we have been through because someone was ashamed and spoke up about it:
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Once in four years, just once, perhaps we could:
Forgive, forget, relax, care, stand out, speak up, contribute, embrace, create, make a ruckus, give credit, skip, smile, speak truth and refuse to compromise–more than we usually do. Pick just one or two and start there.
Hey, it’s just one day.
Careful, though, it might become a habit.
