Archive for the ‘Healthy Living’ Category
Believing you are not creates all kinds of drama and suffering in one’s life.
You are not the way you should be, you are not good enough, perfect enough or wealthy enough. These are some of the erroneous beliefs we have accepted as truth. The truth is, in potential we are all whole and complete. No amount of searching outside ourselves to fill any perceive holes within can validate this truth. Believing the lies that you are not sends you on a search for an image outside yourself. When really you should be unleashing the image into the world.
Sometimes we believe so wholeheartedly these lies that we create structures in our lives to support them. The only way to prove this theory is to attempt pulling down the structures you have created and examine their foundations thoroughly. Simply try stop pretending to be what you’re not. Keeping up with the Jones, or the need to impress parents and friends as you conceal the insecurities and self judgments that needs healing. All those structures are really stories you have bought into.
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“A perfectionist is a person who takes great pains, and gives even greater pain to others.”
I came across this thought recently and had to pause for a moment. The endless pursuit of perfection is a psychological sickness that destroys all possibilities of inner growth. It destroys the beingness of our uniqueness and talents as one goes about attempting to attain the impossible. Everybody is trying to be perfect. And the moment somebody starts trying to be perfect he starts expecting everybody else to be perfect. This is the misery of the impossible goal. Condemning, humiliating and giving unsolicited opinions to others ruin the authenticity of self and relationships.
One then begins to feel guilty when he awakens from the illusion that he cannot be perfect. This awakening can come with much sadness and hurt as one loses respect for self and ultimately all others. Imagine what it would be like hanging around this person. The truth is we are hanging around or being this person every day. A perfectionist takes time day and night in the fight with self to be something he or she cannot be and makes those around them very miserable.
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What the average call excellent, the excellent call average.
To leave your mark in the world you will have to stand some place you have never been willing to stand before. You must have the courage to aspire to excellence. You must be willing to break the spell of average.
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Are you tired of people pleasing?
Are you over not meeting other people’s expectation for you? Give yourself permission to be your best self then. Now is the time to take back control of your life. Too often we spend our days seeking the approval of those around us and end up living a life of misery.
For me people pleasing started very early. I recall feeling a sense of not enough after my mother migrated and left me with my relatives. Here I was a dark-skinned little girl surrounded by family and siblings that I thought didn’t look like me. Yes, I knew in kindergarten that I looked different from my sisters because those around me made it known. I sought so hard to be loved and accepted. To simply be liked and considered beautiful. Little did I know that this thought pattern would follow me into my adult years.
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Sometimes leaders and entrepreneurs get locked into thinking that they must look the part of the market they are attempting to get a piece of. Imagine my astonishment when a friend of mine told me she had to buy the mint coat while working on wall street (a few years back) yet she was a pay check away from being evicted.
Now, there are times when we do advocate getting into the vibrational energy of that which you desire to attract but we also advocate wisdom and healthy stewardship – this is called balance. The truth is that the mint coat (for example) will be of no impact if the inside is not a vibrational match. Those you encounter will see right through the facade.
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“H.I.P. people know that confusion is a game we play to keep ourselves stuck in mediocrity. Be H.I.P. Practice trusting your heart.” ~ Coach T
There is an old proverb that says “God is not in confusion” (substitute God for what is appropriate to you) and I cannot tell you how many times this mantra / proverb has parted the red seas of my mind. By simply breathing in and repeating it to self a few times I have been able to pause and gather myself.
Often times you will find that whenever a shift or decision needs to be made some stuff will present itself before you. This usually happen because of fear. Fear of the unknown, fear of the repercussions or fear of the newness that is seeking to express itself in your life. There are also times when you experience gridlock in communication, with no solutions in sight…. Divine is not in confusion! Getting a clear sense of direction is very important during these times. In fact it is best to refrain from any or all life altering decisions when confusion is your state.
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“H.I.P. people are aware that peace of mind comes from not wanting to change others. Be H.I.P. stop trying to change others.”
Chances are you have people in your life whose behavior you wish you could change. Your romantic partner might be putting on a little weight. Your parents may complain too much. Your best friend won’t look for a new job, even though she hates the job she has now.
Once you notice these annoyances, it is natural to want to push people to change. However, is it actually possible to change someone’s behavior? Should you even try? At what price? When we have the urge to try to change someone we are really saying that we are not satisfied with our own Self, we are not at peace with ourselves, for it is our own Self through which we see, hear and judge. Whenever we try to improve someone we are in some way moving into physical or mental manipulation or into the psychological approach and you are ultimately dealing with the effects rather than with cause.
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You can’t prevent yourself or your partner from having an attraction to someone else.
Attraction is a natural part of life. It will happen. Energy is just energy. If you suppress that natural flow of attraction, what will often happen is that you will end up disconnecting from a part of yourself, which in turn affect the flow of chemistry between you and your partner.
If you let them know how you feel up front, they at least have a choice whether to continue in the relationship with you or not, rather than being there under false pretense. If you both agree to be monogamous and faithful to each other, then honor that commitment. But if it’s not your authentic truth and you are simply agreeing to what you think you should, then you are already being unfaithful to yourself and your partner.
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7 Steps To Having No Problems
We would love to share with you “7 of our most favorite steps to having no problems” in your life as taken from Coachville coaching materials, which Coach T is also trained in.
We are certain if practiced, these tools will open your life to experience more joy.
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Hang out exclusively with people who have zero problems. This may require a new address book.
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Simplify your life. A complicated life is a request for problems.
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Here is a thought for you to ponder on Discipline at a higher level:
“Rules should arise out of your understanding. They should not be imposed from the outside. Discipline should not be slavery. All true discipline is self-discipline and self-discipline is never against freedom. Only disciplined people become free, but their discipline is not obedience to others: their discipline is obedience to their own voice.”
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