Joy is a decision.
It is a conscious choice. But it is even more than that. Joy is an obligation. We have an obligation to express and share our joy with the world – our unique calling. In this light, joy is more than an attitude; it is a potent and powerful source of energy. One of the major reason that so many people are depressed – living joyless lives is that they are not living their unique calling – they are wearing someone else’s shoes.
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H.I.P. People have discovered that joy is what happens when we allow ourselves to recognize how good things are. Be H.I.P. recognize how good life is.
Selecting the music for our wedding proved to be more challenging than I thought it would have been. In fact I remember the days growing up when I would be making a list with all the songs that was going to play at my wedding. I knew all these songs word for word but when the time came and years passed, the songs no longer fit my conscious evolution. The words no longer matched the vibration and essence of the occasion that Charles and I envisioned. Honestly, most of the lyrics from the music today no longer vibrate with me because I am standing in the awareness that the music, the words, the sounds all plays a part in my feelings and dreams about life.
Fortunately, we had just gotten Rev. Beckwith (Agape International) cd titled TranscenDance and we were in joy with all the songs on the album. Certainly we thought about all the people who would be at the wedding that wasn’t into this type of music but we decided to choose for us and what our higher selves was calling to do. As I reflected on the H.I.P. quote above it reminded me of the song we selected as our introduction music for the after party. The chorus goes like this:
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How do you get across the bridge before you?
The one you have created with your imagination and laced with trimmings of accolades and achievements that will support you in living your best life. Often times we can envision so well the life we desire. The relationships we would like to experience and the family and friends we would like to help out. The imagery keeps us up at night and perhaps we retell the stories over and over to those around us.
However, there comes that time when we must get the goals and dreams from our minds and into our expressed world, where they become accomplished and or manifested. No longer can you leave it to chance or the big break to get this done but you must begin at once to take the necessary steps. Crossing this bridge is really about the practice discipline. Using the practice of discipline can help you in three ways:
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Believing you are not creates all kinds of drama and suffering in one’s life.
You are not the way you should be, you are not good enough, perfect enough or wealthy enough. These are some of the erroneous beliefs we have accepted as truth. The truth is, in potential we are all whole and complete. No amount of searching outside ourselves to fill any perceive holes within can validate this truth. Believing the lies that you are not sends you on a search for an image outside yourself. When really you should be unleashing the image into the world.
Sometimes we believe so wholeheartedly these lies that we create structures in our lives to support them. The only way to prove this theory is to attempt pulling down the structures you have created and examine their foundations thoroughly. Simply try stop pretending to be what you’re not. Keeping up with the Jones, or the need to impress parents and friends as you conceal the insecurities and self judgments that needs healing. All those structures are really stories you have bought into.
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Imagine for a moment that you get that your sadness is absolutely yours?
It is authentically yours! Yet on the same coin lies your happiness which is shallow and not yours because often times it depends on something or somebody. Anything that makes you dependent is not yours. Be it the girlfriend, boyfriends or job, all that can change in the twinkle of an eye and with it goes your happiness. Frequently we try to avoid our sadness by not seeing or feeling it. We numb this with sex, drugs, shopping and food for example.
If we feel sad, we watch a comedy or go shopping or merely start doing something so that we neither feel or look at our sadness. What if your sadness was a sacred space that when explored could take you deeper within yourself? What it there where gifts and talents to be mined from this sadness? Lessons and insights to be learned? Could there be beauty in sadness?
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Because times are changing and families everywhere are seeking new and different ways of holding unto the traditions that are so very important to them. When you christen your child you are making a public statement that you have made the conscious decision to raise your child according to spiritual principles. You are declaring the truth that you are a teacher. In the society today it is important that we continue to make a safe and open space for our children to express and grow into their full potential.
Unless you parent in the total spirit of Love, it doesn’t matter what laws you think you are teaching—they will just become lifeless rules that your child will discard, as soon as there is no longer an authoritative finger around. Get the tools necessary by attending one of our pre-christening sessions to deepen your awareness of how important this right of passage is.
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The best hope for a revolutionary transformation to take place to create a world that works for everyone is a worldwide, grassroots revolution of love in action, based in authentic community.
In this community we have to engage in open conversation and communication between elders honed by sometimes brutal experience and the wise and impassioned young, hungry for a way out of terminal disaster and for a way of life in alignment with their hunger for a new way of being and doing everything.
We long to be connected with others in an authentic community. What steps can we take to create authentic communities? Authentic communities welcome new people from all backgrounds. Authentic community does not have a max capacity there is always room for someone else that may need and can offer what your community is up to. Authentic communities collaborate with others. Before change can take place, leaders must recognize the need for intentional collaboration regarding policies, procedures and decisions. Only collaborative leadership can make communities succeed. Authentic communities empower those on the same mission. The greatest path to success is the path that helps lead other people to it. Authentic communities doesn’t just include people, it involves them. We should absolutely be welcoming of new people.
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“A perfectionist is a person who takes great pains, and gives even greater pain to others.”
I came across this thought recently and had to pause for a moment. The endless pursuit of perfection is a psychological sickness that destroys all possibilities of inner growth. It destroys the beingness of our uniqueness and talents as one goes about attempting to attain the impossible. Everybody is trying to be perfect. And the moment somebody starts trying to be perfect he starts expecting everybody else to be perfect. This is the misery of the impossible goal. Condemning, humiliating and giving unsolicited opinions to others ruin the authenticity of self and relationships.
One then begins to feel guilty when he awakens from the illusion that he cannot be perfect. This awakening can come with much sadness and hurt as one loses respect for self and ultimately all others. Imagine what it would be like hanging around this person. The truth is we are hanging around or being this person every day. A perfectionist takes time day and night in the fight with self to be something he or she cannot be and makes those around them very miserable.
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What the average call excellent, the excellent call average.
To leave your mark in the world you will have to stand some place you have never been willing to stand before. You must have the courage to aspire to excellence. You must be willing to break the spell of average.
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Are you tired of people pleasing?
Are you over not meeting other people’s expectation for you? Give yourself permission to be your best self then. Now is the time to take back control of your life. Too often we spend our days seeking the approval of those around us and end up living a life of misery.
For me people pleasing started very early. I recall feeling a sense of not enough after my mother migrated and left me with my relatives. Here I was a dark-skinned little girl surrounded by family and siblings that I thought didn’t look like me. Yes, I knew in kindergarten that I looked different from my sisters because those around me made it known. I sought so hard to be loved and accepted. To simply be liked and considered beautiful. Little did I know that this thought pattern would follow me into my adult years.
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